Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
