Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
