I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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