i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
