I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I'm both gender and math confused
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