Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
