lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
