Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
