Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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