i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
