we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
