ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Please, let me fuck your mom
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
