Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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