I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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