WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
