Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
