Your dad touched me again.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
