He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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