Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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