Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
