what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
