I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
