We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize