I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
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thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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