She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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