Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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