I wanna passion pit in your ass
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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