she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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