Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
