I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
