What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
