there's paper in my vomit.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize