Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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