Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
