shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
