Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize