sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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