I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
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