so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
