This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
