so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
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