You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I'm going to jail i love you
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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