He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
