I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
