You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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