Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
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