my mouth tastes like poor choices
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
