yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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