I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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