We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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