I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
